Making the Workplace Parent-Friendly
“A society needs children; society should support their parents” Silvia Weisner
We know we want healthy, kind, happy children growing up in the world. Do we always make the connection between the support and environment we create for parents in order to do this?
Silvia, a previous guest of Fire and Forte, recently wrote a LinkedIn Post calling out the importance of supporting parents. She pointed to German Government plans to halve the income ceiling at which families stop being eligible for government benefits while taking parental leave.
Silvia calls it the say/do gap when it comes to gender equality. ‘Structural enablers are key for women to choose both career and family - financial support does have an impact on family and childcare choices”.
The Say/Do Gap
The term ‘the motherhood penalty’ applies to the disadvantage mothers face compared to childless women and men. Acutely aware of the need to demonstrate suitable working environments for parents, most employers are vocal about policies such as flexible working and maternity and paternity leave. However, is it the case that there is a gap in what they say, v’s what they do?
When returning to work, the motherhood penalty can be at most prevalent. Gauri Gokhale, the founder of Mentorgain, struggled to get back into a role at all “I have achieved significant success in technology and business development and studied at some of the most prestigious educational institutions in the world - however, when the time came to resume my career after starting a family, I was met with skepticism and was treated as if I were a newcomer”.
Her vast experience seemed to suddenly be overlooked, as if raising a family had wiped it out, “sadly many individuals continue to pay lip service without truly embodying the principles they espouse”.
What to do differently?
Claire Hennah’s focus on new parents has been influenced by her lived experience returning to work from maternity leave. The Unilever Beauty & Wellbeing Chief Customer and Digital Commerce Officer recently shared on Fire and Forte she is a leader who believes in ‘being real’ and stressed the importance of communication to help parents adjust.
“Checking in is so important, asking new parents ‘how are you getting on?’, and ensuring you can get the right ‘return to work’ scenario in place”.
The expectation of new parents as return to work needs some consideration. Claire shares how we can easily assume they can pick up where they left off, “a lot of the time they’re thrown straight back into it” yet their life would have changed considerably.
Dad’s want to be closer to their children
Káti Gapaillard of the Fathering Project is focused on society evolving to support Dads. “Fathers these days are trying and want to be closer to their children, and children need their fathers too”. Káti shared on her Fire and Forte episode why paternity was so crucial “That early bonding with your child sets a pattern for later on in life and the whole journey of fatherhood - it's really important to do that at the beginning”.
Taking the full paternity leave allowance and working in a way that works around family commitments are becoming more commonplace, but its crucial organisations celebrate it - and senior leaders help here too.
“It was fantastic recently hearing a CEO say “I am first a Dad, and then a CEO” Káti said.
Dexter Cousins, the founder of Fintech Headhunter Tier One People is one such Father. He says on the company homepage “I feel privileged to contribute to the Australian Fintech startup ecosystem. But I cherish most my roles as a Dad and Husband.”
“I think it's important for my clients to know what drives me and why” he added in a follow up conversation. “The business is the vehicle with which I get to deliver on the promises I made to myself about the kind of Dad I wanted to be but more importantly the kind of Dad my kids and wife deserve.”
Dexter Cousins from One Tier People
Let’s be aware and supportive of the pressures on parents, Káti says that the biggest challenge she hears Dad’s have is “marrying up what they feel they should be doing as a Dad and also what they should be doing at work”. That’s a lot of pressure on men and understandably can impact on their mental health.
“As a society we need to understand this and create a mechanisms to support men (and women of course) in order to support children” she says.
How do we do this?
Workplaces that enable open communication, flexibility and also understanding is what counts. Claire Hennah says the trust is unquestioned “it's the quality of the work that counts”
Reassessing the paradigm of gender and parent roles are key, and mean questioning our processes. For soon to be fathers who are trying to do the right thing, workplaces that assume the full paternity leave will be taken and work with the colleague on how to manage workload may help this shift.
Getting back into work after longer breaks should be a conscious focus by hiring teams, ask different questions such as what skills and experiences from maternity leave could be interesting or helpful in the workplace. Not only have many women begun side hustles or acquired new skills as they raise a child and build a new network - they’re also - as Dr Jenine Beekhuyzen said emphatically on Fire and Forte “mums are by far the most organised!”
Providing accessible training to those on parental leave or returning from it, could help maintain knowledge and skills needed in the workplace - especially important in this digital era. Talent, nor confidence, would then not be lost, and more people could thrive on their return to work.
What do you think could make workplaces more parent-friendly?
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